That's what it's called, right? When you can't see your horse as anything but perfect? I'm trying to decide if I have that. I don't think I do, I mean, I don't think Sophie is perfect by any means, but sometimes my feelings get really hurt when at the barn. Like today. Today was Sophie's big lesson with Kim. Our last lesson went so well I thought that it'd be even better to have Kim ride Sophie for a lesson period so that I could watch and actually *see* what she was telling me to do.
Well, it was a disaster.
A complete and utter disaster. At some points I wanted to cry.
It started out ok, walking around and working on paying attention and focusing. They did lots of walking and giving and getting a better walk. Then they started trotting, and Sophie started flipping her head. Constantly. Flipping her head and trotting with her nose way high in the air. I don't know if Kim was just asking for more than I do or what, but Sophie was like a different horse. She's never been that bad for me, other than that very first lesson when she was in heat and not happy being in the indoor. She was flipping her head and hopping on her hind feet a little. It was awful. I'm still not sure what went wrong.
They did have a few good moments, but overall we had a nicer ride in my last lesson as far as doing nice circles. We leg yielded nicely then as well and worked on turns across the diagonal. Today they did circles and a little baby shoulder in. I was impressed with how well she did the baby shoulder in, but part of the problem was trying it to the right. To the left it was awesome, to the right it was harder, and she got frustrated and then another fight followed. Ugh.
And then listening to the lecture for 10 minutes after about how horrible Sophie is and how bad her attitude is and how mean she is and evil. How she's awful on the ground and is willing to do anything possible to get out of work. The only problem is, I don't have those problems with her. On the ground she has never tried to run me over or paw at me or been otherwise bad. Under saddle she has had a couple of bad moments where she would flip her head up fast, but I would sit deep, drive her forward with my legs and seat and then she'd be fine. It wouldn't be constant like it was today. It was hard to listen to, because on one hand, she was being bad today, I'm not sure why, but she was. But she isn't like that with me, but what can I say? So I mainly listened since there wasn't anything else I could do.
Ugh. Poor Sophie was sooooo sweaty and bewildered by the end of the ride. Kim wasn't mean or anything, never jerked on her or smacked her out of anger or anything like that. But she was very hard on Sophie as far as expectations and results and I just think it was a little too much for Sophie. It will be interesting to see how she is tomorrow. I hosed her off and rubbed liniment on her neck, she seemed content by the time I was done with her. I felt so torn. I've never felt so torn. I wish I knew what had happened.
And another thing that was mentioned that I thought was odd was that Kim said that once Sophie was "finished" she would be very soft mouthed and light to the hand and that it would make her harder to sell. Not that I have any intention of selling her, but I just thought it was odd that being responsive would make a horse *harder* to sell, you'd think it'd be the opposite! At least I would. I guess another part of what bothered me about today was that I pointed out that Sophie doesn't act that bad with me and Kim said that she has stronger legs/seat and I couldn't help but wonder, why she would ride Sophie like she would ride one of her horses and expect her to react the same. Maybe I'm just off base, but I would think it'd be best to ride the horse in a way that gets the reaction you want, not ride the horse with the aids you think it should take and then make her give the reaction you want. But I don't know, I've only been taking lessons regularly for four months last year and then a handful this year. Maybe I'm just too nice. I do know that I could never be a horse trainer based on today's experience. Ugh, that's all I can really say.